I love Bayonetta.
The titular character oozes style. She hits hard, can pause time and navigates the field in the most satisfying ways, all while looking good.
It’s hard not to love her, which is a shame, because she is the only good part of this game.
Bayonetta 3 is an old-school style of combo fighter. Hit buttons in the right order and your character does something cool.
It’s a great system, made better with "Witch Time". By dodging at the right time you temporarily freeze time and blast away your enemies.
You also have a variety of powerful weapons and can summon gnarly demons to aid you in battle. It’s great.
The combat is the most fun I’ve had playing in a long time, which is why I find Bayonetta 3 so frustrating.
While navigating the multiverse-spanning plot, the game spends so much time making you do everything but fight things as Bayonetta.
Each level features an unholy amount of collectables and petty distractions which you are almost obligated to chase.
I don’t mind the aesthetic collectables, which are picked up by walking through them and actively enjoy trying to unlock new outfits for Bayonetta, but character upgrade materials are locked behind banal puzzles.
The worst offender goes to the platforming time puzzles. You activate a block, then have a limited amount of time to hit five checkpoints. Your reward is some type of item that will upgrade your characters.
And that’s the issue.
These aren’t purely aesthetic collectables. You need to get them to get more health and summoning power.
The game punishes you for ignoring them, but ignoring them is the best way to play the game.
The tedium continues over into different aspects of the gameplay, specifically the other playable characters.
Viola is the latest addition to the witch roster.
She has less functionality than Bayonetta and feels sluggish to play at times. That’s combined with an overbearing amount of cliche rookie clumsiness and an aesthetic that matches the corporate image of what a ‘70s punk rocker looks like.
You also play as another witch named Jeanne. Her levels are awkward side scrolling missions with a spy theme. They are out of place and exhausting.
And that is why I’m so mad with this game. There’s so much good that is hidden away by mountains of tedium.
Each stage feels like it was designed with some kind of checklist. It must have this many collectables. It must have a big monster battle at the end. It must have a high speed demon surfing section. And to be fair, some of this is really cool. The demon surfing rocks and some boss fights are fun. But it’s all so routine.
The plot feels similar. Explore a new dimension and work alongside an alternative form of Bayonetta, over and over again. After awhile you’ll feel tired and turn the game off.
All you are left with is questions. Why limit the amount of weapons I can use in a battle? Why am I wasting time doing silly side tasks? Why are the cutscenes so long? Why did the developers think any of this was a good idea?
I thought we left this style of level design behind in the PlayStation 2 and early PlayStation 3 era. I cannot fathom why anybody thought it was a good idea to bring it back.
Bayonetta 3 feels like a clash between a great game and a terrible one. It is unfortunate the good parts make me want to keep playing.
