The Chappell-Hadlee Trophy launched with great fanfare in 2004-05 but has run out of fizz. Cricket writer Adrian Seconi asks six very, very tough questions ahead of the next edition, which gets under way in Cairns on Tuesday.
What's for lunch?
You may well scoff while we scoff it down. But that subheading is not just a pointer for the readers to dismiss all that follows as another shameless attempt to fill space — it is a sad indictment on the standard of catering. Why else are so few journalists attending games these days? Around the time when the Chappell-Hadlee series was still fresh, the media centre was a thriving hub where people did more than jostle for spots in the queue for the satay — they actually scribbled a few satirical notes in indecipherable shorthand before taking a long nap after said satay. Mmmmm. Now we have to settle for Black Caps media manager Willy Nicholls interviewing his brother Henry Nicholls. That is not particularly spicy.
Note: Henry Nicholls did not make the Chappell-Hadlee squad. Selectors went with Finn Allen instead. Willy is going to have a few curly questions for you, Mr Allen.
What's in a name?
Trevor Chappell.
The Chappell-Hadlee Trophy says it all. We offered up our greatest cricketer and their decision to name it after Trevor Chappell is an under-armed attempt to needle us before a match was ever played. Of course it is possible they named it after Greg, who could play a bit. Or perhaps Ian, who was handy as well. Between them they scored roughly 12,500 test runs. Show-offs. Of course, it is even more likely the trophy was named after both families who made a big contribution to cricket in Australasia. Whatever. The joke is on you, Australia. Walter, Richard or Dale Hadlee were not the inspiration. We went with Barry Hadlee who played two ODIs for New Zealand and had a top score of 19. The question is should we rename it the Trevor-Barry Trophy? At the very least, it should be the Hadlee-Chappell, right?
Contract? No thanks
The series has been cancelled. The Black Caps will instead be playing in various domestic T20 leagues around the world. Some will hand back their central contracts before inking lucrative deals like Trent Boult. Others will get drafted then make "unforeseen" announcements to retire from international cricket like Colin de Grandhomme. What could possibly be attractive about a doing a fraction of the work for a mountain of cash? But look on the bright side — if the trickle becomes a flood then come on down the next Richard de Groen.
Note: Boult is actually playing in the series. It is a rather inconvenient truth that does not fit with the general sense of panic we are trying to foster among cricket purists.
Shall we make it an under-23 competition?
Since no-one under 30 wants to play for just the glory and the "modest" remuneration package any more, perhaps is it time to accept that all international cricket is just a development tournament for the IPL, and competitions like the Chappell-Hadlee should be viewed that way as well. You could include a couple of over-aged players to bolster the experience. Perhaps Ross Taylor could be talked into coming out of retirement. We might even let him captain the side and sack him halfway through the series like in the good old days.
Does anyone care?
According to Australian batter Usman Khawaja, ODIs are "dying a slow death" unlike his own limited-overs career — rigor mortis set in several years back. But he might have a point. Outside of the World Cup, how much interest is there in ODI bilateral contests?
What subscription will we need to watch this series?
Asking for a friend.
