I was asked, today, to do a final preview of the big swim race this Friday at the Gore Aquatic Centre. But to be honest with you, dear reader, the time for words is over.
Much like Michelangelo, slowly I, and my fellow competitors, have chipped away at our unrefined potential.
On Friday, we will show the sculpture, the polished and buffed marble which lay dormant underneath our soft, pudding-cup bodies.
There has been a lot of talk about the race, and many people have approached me to share their thoughts or predictions.
Readers may notice I have gone very light on our Mayor Ben Bell.
I suppose he has taken my silence as weakness, whereas the reality is I stayed silent because of my empathy.
I lapped him twice at swim training, when he was doing sprints and I was warming down and I refused to comment, because I’m respectable.
I’m grateful for Hato Hone St John in Gore, and I’m happy the money raised is heading over to their organisation because they’re going to have to mend a few broken hearts come Friday.
You work hard, you train, diet, try your best, and eventually you hit a wall of someone with a staggering amount of natural talent, and that just is what it is.
The good news about it being for charity is, when all is said and done and I’m being carried out of the pool with gold around my neck, the other grovelling worms in the race will be able to clasp at the straws of no, we just did this for a good cause, and that’s what matters.
• Friday, gold coin donation, Gore Aquatic Centre, 6pm, come and support swimming and St John.
