UFC president and CEO Dana White speaks next to Republican President-elect Donald Trump and his wife, Melania, during his election victory celebration in Palm Beach County Convention Centre, Florida, on Wednesday. At left is Republican National Committee co-chairperson Lara Trump.
The craziness . . .
One casts one’s mind back a few months when one was having a conversation — possibly entirely fictitious — with one’s colleague.
One: "I am feeling bullish, buoyant and downright bold. Time to make some predictions that are going to really raise some eyebrows."
The Other: "A reminder you are famously awful at predictions."
One: "Hey, I predicted the evil Crusaders would tumble off their perch this season. AND LOOK WHAT HAPPENED."
The Other: "Get on with it, please."
One: "The White Ferns will win the T20 World Cup."
The Other: "Bah ha ha ha. Please don’t tell me you have put your life savings on that bet."
One: "Just a lazy fiver. Rightio, how about this: the orange menace will return to the White House."
The Other: "........."
One: "Fair point. Not a particularly wild bet. The Americans won’t be able to help themselves. OK, here comes the big finish. Ready for the most outlandish prediction in the history of New Zealand sport? The Black Caps are going to sweep India 3-0 in the test series in India."
Conversation ends as The Other smiles sympathetically and suggests one might want to lie down for a while.
. . . of cricket
Naturally, because this is New Zealand and this weird little country just can’t help itself, many are now obsessed with one question.
Who will win the Halberg Award?
Not sure why we cannot just enjoy great sporting achievements on their own without having to validate them with a subjective award, but anyhoo.
•Ko or Carrington for top sportswoman is a massive call. Carrington is the GOAT, but golf is so massive, and Ko was so incredible.
•Hamish Kerr presumably the favourite for top sportsman. An Olympic gold in track and field is a huge deal.
•So many teams, so few trophies. Halberg judges love a rowing crew, so "super mums" Brooke Francis and Lucy Spoors might get the nod. For me, it’s a shootout between the White Ferns and the Black Caps (not the yachties). And ... stay tuned.
•The 1982 All Whites better get inducted to the Hall of Fame or I will get really grumpy.
Number of the week
Start with 85.
Black Caps spin bowler Ajaz Patel has taken 85 test wickets outside New Zealand and precisely zero on these shores.
Then move to 18.
David O’Sullivan is next on the "most test wickets by a Kiwi bowler without taking any at home" list — naturally provided by stats guru Francis Payne — with 18 wickets.
Irish inquisition
Some like to call me cynical. I prefer to be called a realist.
So, your man’s fearless prediction this morning is that the All Blacks will fall to a defeat, not heavy, to the Irish in Dublin.
That was an important win over England last week, and there are signs that some areas of this All Blacks team are developing nicely.
But I look at the Irish, and their strength in depth, and their success over the All Blacks in recent years, and the problems the All Blacks continue to have with discipline, and the question marks that remain over the No10 jersey, and the prediction has to be for Irish eyes to be smiling.
This really is a huge test, though. Scott Robertson and his men could transform their year with a victory.
Make it make sense
Last week came this more-ludicrous-by-the-day news of the two Indian teams joining the New Zealand basketball league.
This week, the madness continues.
It is hard to believe the Nuggets have given popular coach Brent Matehaere the boot.
I am no expert when it comes to the inner workings of the Otago NBL team — and I am slightly biased, as Matehaere played a couple of games for my beloved Old Golds — but it seems a harsh way to treat a man who has delivered such success.
The Nuggets were, in case their Australian owners did not realise, a basket case for a long time.
Matehaere, who bleeds blue and gold, played a huge role in their resurrection and will forever be immortalised as the first coach to win the NBL with the Nuggets.
He was also a coach who would walk over to the media bench on the final whistle to give a tight-on-deadline reporter some time, and who once texted me to "apologise for that bad interview".
Nobody has a divine right to coach a sporting team, and the Nuggets were not great in 2024, but this is a decision that seems premature and unfair.
The lads
Quick follow-up from last week’s mention of the number of teenaged boys playing rugby in New Zealand plummeting over a decade.
Otago rugby boss Richard Kinley points out that, in 2014, the teenaged bracket was for players aged 14-20, and it has been changed to a 13-18 bracket, thus skewing the numbers downwards.
Kinley also says Otago — which so often bucks the national sporting trend, in a positive fashion — had 1950 teenagers in 2019 and now sits at 2130.
Gettin’ jiggy wit’ it
If only Will Smith had run for US president.
Social media is a cesspit at the best of times but it does throw up some fun stuff.
I learned this week that Will Smith — no, not that one — won a baseball World Series ring for a fifth consecutive year.
Dodgers catcher Will Smith won his second title with the victory over the Yankees last week, having earned his first in the Covid-shortened 2020 season.
Between his titles, another Will Smith — a left-handed relief pitcher — won three consecutive World Series rings with three different teams, the Braves (2021), Astros (2022) and Rangers (2023).
Name of the week
Gout Gout.
No, not a particularly bad case of that form of arthritis, but the next big thing in world athletics.
The Last Word had already heard of the teenaged Australian sprint sensation and it seems only a matter of time before the world takes notice.
Gout, born in Brisbane to South Sudan emigrants, ran a time of 20.29sec for the 200m earlier this week.
That is an insanely quick time, not only smashing Oceania under-20 and under-18 records but also taking him to FOURTH on the all time Australian 200m list.
Gout has (predictably) been compared to a young Usain Bolt, and has already signed a mega-deal with adidas. Watch this space.
