A revelation to few, New Zealand men have long had a love-hate relationship with overt signs of affection for their mates, with nearly one third of New Zealand blokes having never said "I love you" to a mate or cannot remember ever having done so.
The winds of change may be blowing, as new data commissioned by Speight’s indicates more than 50% of New Zealand blokes want their mates to say "I love you" more often.
Conducted in April from a sample pool of 542 males aged 18 to 60, the study showed apparent regional differences, with men from Auckland over five times more likely to say those three little words over their mates in Otago and Southland.
The study showed Southlanders tied with West Coasters are to be the least likely to declare their love for their mates, with their North Island counterparts being twice as likely to have told their mates they love them in the last 24 hours.
Despite hesitations around expressing the words "I love you", 98% of participants have employed their own languages of love, with many opting to give a slap on the back or shout a beer to show they care.
Lion marketing manager John Steiner said the company had partnered with the Highlanders to help spread the love and encourage blokes to say those three little words more.
Highlanders player Jona Nareki said saying "I love you" was something most blokes heard more often when they were "on the sauce", but he felt they were getting better at sharing their feelings while sober as well.
"It’s never a weakness, it’s probably a strength to have those strong conversations, because you never know what your friends are going through until that comes up ... It’s way more important now, seeing our suicide rates that are happening in New Zealand ... Being able to open up is really important."
Playing rugby in a team environment, he said it was fairly challenging to get emotions out of some players, "especially the forward pack", but like most blokes they were getting better at opening up.
"I feel like I say it probably most of the time, but I think the boys probably think I’m joking more than I am."
Highlights of the research showed 57% of men said they wished blokes would say I love you more, 33% said it made them feel happier to be told they were loved, 27% of men had never said I love you or could not remember if they had, and 69% of men under 35 said they had told a mate they love them in the last six months, compared with just a quarter of those over the age of 50.
