In fact, the phrase might sit nicely as a departmental motto or mission statement for his pet project, the rather Monty-Pythonesque sounding Ministry of Regulation.
Setting up a new government department to fight government bureaucracy and labyrinthine regulatory environments seems just a touch farcical. However, the earnest Mr Seymour insists it has a vital job to do and appears, or pretends, not to see the irony most of the rest of us can.
This week we discovered a little more about his new ministry, specifically how well paid some of its staff are, leading to fresh charges from other political parties of hypocrisy on Mr Seymour’s part at a time when more than 6000 public service jobs have been cut to save money.
Documents released to the Green Party show the $154,500 median salary of Regulation Ministry staff is getting on for twice as much as that of the public service median, of $84,800.
The department’s average salary is currently $152,034, compared with the public service’s $97,200 mean.
Just over 90 staff will be employed when the ministry is fully up and running, which as commentators have pointed out will make it more than four times the size of the Productivity Commission which Mr Seymour and his ilk scrapped in February. Rather alarmingly, it appears the ministry will include three deputy chief executives, each earning between $250,000 and $350,000 a year.
It's not a good look. Yes, the work will presumably require a good deal of technical and legal knowledge which comes with seniority in the public service. But the questions bothering many are, does this ministry actually need to exist, and will it actually improve the situation or make things even more maze-like?
Green MP Francisco Hernandez told The Post it was "galling" the government was happily pruning the public service while cultivating its own pet ministries.
We remain doubtful of the value of the new ministry and agree it is bordering on distasteful when so many others in the sector are losing their jobs. We also think it possible the bureaucracy-busters may end up strangled by their own, and others’, red tape.
Also in the tone-deaf category this week was Prime Minister Christopher Luxon’s bid to establish his own Ministry of Teaching Your Grandmother to Suck Eggs.
At the Local Government New Zealand conference in Wellington, Mr Luxon saw fit to lecture a room full of mayors and elected representatives on the need for councils to stop wasting money — to "rein in the fantasies" and cut spending on nice-to-haves.
The audible groaning at the patronising homily reportedly turned into booing at the end of his speech, an uncommon move which generally requires the breaching of a high threshold of tolerance.
Mr Luxon also said the government would, again, be abolishing the four wellbeings in legislation, which requires councils to promote the social, economic, environmental and cultural well-being of their communities.
This was only reinstated by the Labour government in 2019 after National scrapped them in 2012, 10 years after they were introduced.
The prime minister certainly has a point about some councils pushing vanity projects and playing fast and loose with their ratepayers’ money. While the country flirts with recession and grapples with a cost-of-living crisis, we shouldn’t be promoting non-essential projects which spendthrift councillors see as good ideas.
However, there are plenty of smaller, generally rural, councils around the country and in the South which are struggling financially and couldn’t dream of kicking off flashy fantasies. Some of these councils barely have enough money to cover the essentials, such as community facilities, roading and local infrastructure.
Mr Luxon’s sermon was insensitive and insulting to those trying to keep communities going on the smell of an oily rag.
