I worry I may have been letting the side down.
Despite volatile tendencies, in years of sports watching I have never resorted to what commentators might call a bit of "how's yer father" (I don't mean sex, although that hasn't featured either).
Much has been said about the pupils involved in the brawl at the first XV semifinal between Kelston Boys High and Auckland Grammar and the fairness or otherwise of the punishments meted out to them by the Auckland Rugby Union.
Why should it be a surprise to anyone that boys from such schools, where I imagine being in the first XV is akin to being at the right hand of God, get the importance of their games out of perspective?
Was the brawl the boys' fault or can such incidents be regarded as almost inevitable, given the emphasis such schools put on winning in sport, particularly rugby?We are not immune in the South, either.
I have never forgotten the open night I attended where the head of a school, who will remain nameless, gave a stirring speech to the assembled parents and prospective pupils which went something like: "There are 15 boys among you who will be in the first XV, there are 11 among you who will be in the first 11 for cricket, there are 20 among you who will become national representatives in sport."
I was dying to ask what his forecast was for the number among us who would struggle with reading, but it didn't seem like the question to put while inside the hallowed school gym.
Some of the spectators at the Kelston-Auckland Grammar game also did not appear to have sport in perspective, with reports suggesting about 100 were involved at the height of the brief melee.
Are any of them to be punished for their stupidity? Should they be?
Since the first of my four sons took up sport 20 odd years ago, I have been an embarrassing, rather than an abusive spectator.
My sideline comments have portrayed my complete lack of understanding of what is happening or given helpful suggestions which stated the obvious.
In my finest moments I have managed to combine both of these skills.
I have endured teasing from fellow spectators for consistently praising the play of my own kith and kin when they are not even on the field or court, and missing the moments when they have done amazing things because I am too busy talking.
Fellow spectators have also taken an interest in the off-field battles I have had with my knitting needles over the years.
Those who laughed at the cricket pullover I knitted which reached the knees of my 12-year-old after its first wash (the embarrassment possibly prompting him to give up cricket soon after) will be pleased it now has a properly-fitting second life now the thwack of leather on willow is part of his life again.
Meeting other spectators has been one of the joys of my sports involvement.
Although we might only see each other during the season of the sport involved, over the years we have shared some of the triumphs and tragedies which go with watching boys graduate from gangly galoots to grown-ups.
So much time has passed I am now called upon to admire snapshots of fellow spectators' grandchildren.
We have had fun, even when our kids have been in rival teams.
We have been generous about each other's offspring, while coyly playing down our own boys' achievements, even when our hearts have been bursting with ridiculous pride.
I like to think we have been able to pay more than lip service to a good game.
A good game to us is an exciting one where play is intense but clean, everyone's best skills are on show and , while there may be a winner, in the end we don't care too much who it is.
Although we have had earnest and sometimes heated discussions over the years on sports politics, umpiring decisions and players' behaviour, I do not recall any of my fellow spectators' involvement in any biffo.
Possibly the closest anyone came was at a junior rugby game when one of our mothers strode purposefully on to the field with a brolly to complain to the ref about his indifference to dangerous play.
I think he offered her the whistle.
She declined, but my recollection is her message was heard.
Perhaps my spectator attitude is out of step.
I am willing to test that and will soon be collecting signatures on a petition seeking a referendum on the subject, "Should a smack as part of good spectator correction be a criminal offence in New Zealand?"You know it's got to be better value for money than the referendum we've just had.
• Elspeth McLean is a Dunedin writer.
