Against all predictions (except mine), Taieri prevailed over a vastly understrength Varsity to grab the Gallaway Trophy and book a home semi against fierce rival Green Island in what will a spectacular shootout to get to the big dance. Kaik earned the five points it needed when it thrashed Zingers by 50 but, alas, it was not to be enough, and it joined the also-rans with two weeks off. Southern did enough to hold off AU and finish its season on a very small mound. AU bestowed the dreaded wooden spoon on Zingers as they all draw a collective sigh of relief at the Pony Pit. At Bastion Point, Zingers wonders where it all went wrong! GI got home over the Sharks with a late intercept to winger Isaak Te Hiwi to make its first semi in 17 years. Te Hiwi will never have to buy another beer at the Toolbox which will certainly please his old man!
The semis and Nostradamus
It's the Battle of the Saddle in the one-plays-four semi. Taieri is at home to GI and should go in with the favourite tag. It is missing Mitchell Scott but he's hardly played this year. Lock Ben Morris is doubtful but word is he will play. Apart from that, the side is at full strength and there is talk of a Highlanders prop on the bench.
The GI forwards will have to play out of their skins to match the Taieri eight. Its defensive kicking game will have to improve dramatically if it is to have any chance. Taieri has beaten it twice, has the home advantage and is the best defensive team in the comp so sorry to the Spannerheads, Taieri goes to the big show at the Greenhouse next week.
In the semi between Varsity and Harbour at Varsity Oval, you would think the Bookworms would be pronounced favourites. I've been tipping them all year to win it all but now I've seen the teams I'm vacillating like a demented moth. Harbour has assembled its strongest team of the season. Its forward pack is gargantuan. Sekonaia and Soloman Pole are fronting, the props are behemoths, the "care bears" Koroi and Misiloi are pillars in the middle row and flankers Elton and Tomkinson are as good as any. Throw in Sio Tomkinson in the midfield and Habour is nearly unbeatable.
Varsity conversely has no Josh Hill (away with NZ Maori colts), no Josh Timu, no Matt Faddes, no Josh Dickson. It has been impressive all year but Harbour may be a bridge too far - Harbour wins. It even tried to get Crusader George Bower in but the heavies wouldn't allow it.
Down on the farm
In the North, Old Boys takes on Maheno after the third and fourth qualifiers upset the favourites in Excelsior and Valley respectively. These two teams last played a final in 2016 which Maheno won in extra time. Old Boys wins just. More on which clubs are still alive in 2020 next week. In Central, Upper Clutha takes on Arrowtown at home. Arrowtown has beaten the mob twice this year but I'm tipping the Wanaka boys finally get up. The Cromwell Goats take on Wakatipu at home and, after retaining the "Horse" last week, just get it done to give us the same final as last year. In the South, Clutha takes on Heriot and wins in a canter at home. Owaka challenges the Kai boys at the Crescent clubrooms and will win and be in its first final since the 1960s - the dream continues. You heard it here first!
Finals day
The draw is out for finals day and most clubs are underwhelmed but have agreed to the format. First game is the prem colts final at 10.45am, the prem 2 final is at 12.30pm, the women's final is at 2.15pm and the prem final at 4.15pm. The junior colts final will be at Logan Park at 1pm. There are two big issues for most clubs. 1) By playing the women's final as the curtain raiser will the crowd stay on for the prem final? A lot would say no. 2) In many cases, the clubs told their junior colts teams the final would be in the stadium and we haven't lived up to that promise. We still have a lot of work to do in this final space but apologies to our junior colts for letting you down.
This weekend
Destroyed the president, "Uncle Des", last week and on to Mayor Dave Cull this week. This is Dave's last hurrah so I thought I'd give him one more shot at the title. Dave is probably getting out before they turn George St into a green paddock and retailers start pitching tents! Taieri (12-) will be too strong for GI at the Elver Pit. Harbour (12-) has no excuse to lose to Varsity and shouldn't. Good luck to all four sides.
Rumours to finish
Adam Thomson could be turning out for Otago and Jordie Barrett could be at the Landers in 2020. Woody Kirkwood, from GI, is rumoured to be in the middle row for North Otago. Next week I'll look at the Otago coach candidates and have the dreaded report card.