Speaking out for the first time more than three years on from the incident, the woman — who has permanent name suppression — says she remains haunted by images of Blair Tamihana trapping her in a Portobello caravan while trying to gas them both to death.
The 47-year-old was declined parole last month but his sentence ends in March next year.
Tamihana was allowed early release in January but after just two months of freedom he travelled across the South Island to see his victim and consumed alcohol — both breaches of his conditions.
He was subsequently recalled to prison to continue serving his sentence.
He told the Parole Board that he had met the woman at her request and did so because he wanted to "close that chapter" of their relationship.
The victim, however, vehemently disputed that, and said she only contacted Tamihana after he had viewed her LinkedIn profile dozens of times.
"I just wanted to know if I needed to live in fear, about what his next step was," she told the Otago Daily Times.
The woman said Tamihana came to her home town rather than the neutral location she had suggested, and he had bought her jewellery.
At his sentencing in 2020, she wrote a statement saying she would give him one more chance, but had since changed her position.
"I’ve tried to forgive him but I can’t now. I just realise he’s too dangerous for me to have in my life," she said.
She described Tamihana as a "gaslighter" and time apart had given her clarity.
"He could make me feel like the best person in the world and destroy me at the same time," the victim said.
"[People like him] show you all this love then they rip it all away."
The pair had been in an 11-month relationship when in March 2019, Tamihana took her to the Portobello Village Tourist Park where he was staying.
He was on bail at the time and barred from contact with her.
After stabbing himself in the stomach with a hunting knife, Tamihana swallowed nine prescription painkillers then ordered his then partner to take one.
He disabled her cellphone, turned the gas on and parked his vehicle up against the caravan door before climbing in through a bathroom window.
The victim vividly recalled the moment when he told her she was going to die that night.
After waiting for Tamihana to pass out she escaped through the window and alerted authorities.
"I saved his life," she said.
"He wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for me."
His release now loomed.
"I do fear for my life. I really worry about the public when he does get out."
Since his incarceration, the victim said she had struggled to find stability in her life, but paid tribute to Women’s Refuge, who had put her through courses and given her confidence to find fulltime work.
She would have a panic alarm installed in her home before Tamihana was released and would wear a pendant that would monitor her movement by GPS.
"I want to be a voice for other women to show that we can survive this and we can start a new life," she said.
"There’s hope for women who have gone through domestic violence."
A recent psychologist’s report noted Tamihana, while locked up, had not undergone any treatment to address his risk of violent offending.
He will see the Parole Board again in January.
