Cold comfort farm

It looks nicely bucolic and all, but there’s not much under the topsoil in Fae Farm, writes Wyatt...
It looks nicely bucolic and all, but there’s not much under the topsoil in Fae Farm, writes Wyatt Ryder. Image: supplied
FAE FARM
For: Nintendo Switch
From: Phoenix Labs
★+

Welcome to 2023’s big budget cosy farming simulator. It’s just like the rest of them.

Plant a turnip, make friends, explore a dungeon. It’s all here for you, repackaged with a fairy theme and some pretty visuals. None of it is very good, though.

Cosy games have really blown up in the past few years. Look through the Switch e-shop and you’ll find plenty. These are designed to relax you with good vibes and steady progress.

People enjoy it. I enjoy it. It’s why Animal Crossing and Stardew Valley are so popular.

I did not enjoy playing Fae Farm. I don’t think I disliked it, but I did feel like I was wasting my life. It’s tedious. It’s bland. Nothing here has depth. The fishing and bug catching mechanics are just those of Animal Crossing, but worse. The farming and dungeon delving is just from Stardew, but worse.

I feel a little guilty comparing games to other, more popular predecessors, but it so clearly just rips off the format, puts in a new setting and calls it a day.

Fae Farm’s worst offence is how safe it plays everything. The characters are never anything but one-dimensional tropes who spend their time repeating the same few lines.

It feels like I’m playing an MMO at times, with every quest being "grow 15 flowers" or "defeat 20 jumbles". Do the quest and the character is happy. Then it’s back to talking about how you cleared out those thorns for the 100th time.

Instead of focusing on being actually good, the game feels like it’s pandering to the kinds of people who like diversity and wholesomeness.

I genuinely think this game might have been designed at a marketing meeting where out-of-touch bigwigs discussed what was "in right now".

It would at least explain why the visuals are so much better than the actual gameplay.

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