Lizz Magasiva told a court about the regular attacks she suffered at the hands of the late actor who became her husband last April, after they met via the social media networking site Instagram.
A court suppression order lifted today, allowing her comments to be published.
In a post on her Instagram page six days ago, she shared a quote from 19th century American writer Mark Twain: "The truth hurts, but silence kills."
The words appear on a mountainous backdrop as the sun is setting or rising - depending on how the viewer sees it.
[[{"type":"instagram_post_url","src":"https://www.instagram.com/p/B56HA3tJ7c2/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaig...","odtEmbed":true}]]
In a letter to the court after her husband's death - the same night she was attacked by him after a night out - she acknowledged that in the past, she had been forced to hide the truth in order to protect her late husband's career.
"In the past you have received letters from me which are carefully constructed under the supervision of my husband.
"I love my husband and I would do anything for him, which included not signing a statement to the police ... and not being truthful so that I may always protect him."
Lizz Magasiva said she was also speaking for her young daughter, Laylah, who had witnessed what she said was the "ongoing violence".
"I need to have a voice for her to show her that this is not okay."
She told the court she did not want name suppression because it would carry on a cycle of silence around an issue that needed to be heard and talked about.
"This is my pain, this is my truth and I need to have the ability to speak freely in order to get through this. I cannot do this in silence. I ask please that the silence end."
Members of the public who have read her story in the past few hours have offered words of encouragement and commended her for coming out about the reality of her situation.
"It must have been terribly hard for you to do this, but you've most definitely done the right thing," one said.
"Now you can heal and people know the truth. It might even help another [domestic violence] victim."
Another said: "Thank you for having the courage to share your truth. I'm so sorry for everything you have and are going through.
"But your ability to now help others is incredible. Keep being amazing!"
One woman commented about how, on the outside, her relationship with Magasiva appeared to be perfectly normal.
Many of the photos the couple shared on social media show them smiling and sharing adventures together. Other photos show them with their respective young daughters.
[[{"type":"instagram_post_url","src":"https://www.instagram.com/p/BwbpqglhcPI/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaig...","odtEmbed":true}]]Shortly before the 38-year-old actor was found dead, the couple enjoyed a trip to Bali.
"Scrolling through your feed, it's easy to presume you had the perfect relationship. This is an opportunity for you to empower others that may be in your situation to speak up and get help.
"Keep working on healing yourself. You are brave."
Domestic violence: Do you need help?
If you're in danger now:
• Phone for police on 111 or ask neighbours of friends to ring for you.
• Run outside to where there are other people.
• Scream for help so that your neighbours can hear you.
• Take the children with you.
• Don't stop to get anything else.
• If you are being abused, remember it's not your fault. Violence is never okay.
Where to go for help or more information:
• Shine, free national helpline 9am-11pm every day - 0508 744 633; www.2shine.org.nz
• Women's Refuge: Free national crisis line operates 24/7 - 0800 refuge or 0800 733 843; www.womensrefuge.org.nz
• Shakti: Providing specialist cultural services for African, Asian and middle eastern women and their children. Crisis line 24/7 0800 742 584
• It's Not Ok: Information line 0800 456 450; www.areyouok.org.nz
Where to get mental health help
• Lifeline: 0800 543 354 (available 24/7)
• Suicide Crisis Helpline: 0508 828 865 (0508 TAUTOKO) (available 24/7)
• Youth services: (06) 3555 906
• Youthline: 0800 376 633
• Kidsline: 0800 543 754 (available 24/7)
• Whatsup: 0800 942 8787 (1pm to 11pm)
• The Word
• Depression helpline: 0800 111 757 (available 24/7)
• Rainbow Youth: (09) 376 4155
• CASPER Suicide Prevention
If it is an emergency and you feel like you or someone else is at risk, call 111.
