1908 Anglo-Welsh team
Rugby
When rugby was in its infancy internationally the home unions marched very much to their own beat. The Scotland team was fiercely amateur, as they all were to some degree, and a combined United Kingdom side was frowned upon by the Scottish and Irish unions. So the Welsh and England unions got together to send a team south.
But many of the top players were unavailable. The game was seen as a recreation and it was a long way to travel to New Zealand.
The side played three tests against New Zealand and came away with two thumpings and a draw.
It did not help that its best player, prop Fred Jackson, was kicked off the tour just before the second test after he was accused of being a Welshman who had played rugby league for years in the north of England before coming back to union.
The Anglo-Welsh side was beaten 32-5 at Carisbrook in the first test and drew the second test 3-3, though that had more to do with the home side having plenty of changes and Athletic Park in Wellington resembling a cow paddock.
Normal service was resumed in the third test with the New Zealand team winning 29-0, scoring nine tries, with just one conversion.
The Anglo-Welsh side limped home and it was 1930 before any sort of combined team from Great Britain would return.
1978 England
Cricket
England came calling under the leadership of Geoffrey Boycott. Boycott, with his blinkered views and opinions, was not the most inspiring of leaders and New Zealanders did not warm to him. Not many did.
The first test was won by New Zealand, its first over the home country after 48 years and 48 matches. Needing only 137 in the second innings to win the game at the Basin Reserve, England was bowled out for just 64. Boycott was dismissed by a memorable yorker from Richard Collinge and that started the fall of wickets, with Richard Hadlee picking up six in the innings and 10 in the match.
The teams then moved to Christchurch and thanks to a century and eight wickets from Ian Botham, the England side levelled the series.
The decider was at Eden Park and took place over six days.
The pitch was like a road and the game lacked urgency. Neither side showed any energy to get on with it. New Zealand’s Geoff Howarth scored 122 in eight hours and then Englishman Clive Radley went even longer, taking more than 10 hours to score 158.
Howarth scored another ton in the second innings as the game meandered to a draw and the tourists went home with little love from the hosts.
1966 British Lions
Rugby
This Lions team was always going to find it tough. The side had an unbeaten eight-match tour of Australia but things got decidedly tougher when it got to New Zealand. It lost to Southland, Wellington and Otago before the first test. The All Blacks were a high-quality unit with many of them — Stan and Colin Meads, Brian Lochore, Ken Gray — at the peak of their powers.
The Lions were skippered by Scotsman Michael Campbell-Lamberton but he played only two tests as others were preferred.
The Lions still had good players such as Mike Gibson and Willie John McBride but were never really contenders, losing the test series 4-0.
The Lions lost the first test at Carisbrook 20-3 and went close 16-12 in the second test at Athletic Park.
But they were well beaten in the other tests in Christchurch (19-6) and Auckland (24-11) and also lost to a combined King Country-Wanganui team.
To complete the miserable tour the side lost to British Columbia in Canada on its way home.
1972 Wallabies
Rugby
Whenever poor touring teams are mentioned, the 1972 Wallabies side always comes up. The Awful Aussies as they were known were simply that — awful.
The side had a tour of 13 games and won only five. It lost to a combined Buller-West Coast side and also went down to a combined Poverty Bay-East Coast team.
The Aussies were said to have a good set of backs with plenty of pace but getting them the ball was the problem.
Ace halfback John Hipwell could not make the tour and his absence was a huge blow. The Wallabies forward pack was solid and tried hard but could never get on top.
The All Blacks were hardly at their peak — the 1970s was not a vintage era — but they were still way too good for the Australians.
The ABs won all three tests by a combined score of 97-26 as the visiting side was simply not good enough to get near them.
1988 Great Britain
Rugby League
The late 1980s had some real characters — and good players — in the Great Britain rugby league side. In 1988 a team stacked with some big names headed south.
Ellery Hanley was the skipper and it also had players such as Shaun Edwards, Martin Offiah and Andy Platt. Platt played only two tests — perhaps he missed his dogs. Great Britain won the two games in Papua New Guinea but came up short in the test series in Australia.
The tour was completed with three games in New Zealand, all of which were lost.
Both Auckland and Wellington beat Great Britain and then during a rainy, windy Christchurch afternoon, the Kiwis got up 12-10 to win and qualify for the World Cup final.
The British side was dogged by injury throughout the tour and never got out of first gear in New Zealand.
1984 England
Cricket
England had won a test series against New Zealand in its summer six months before it arrived in New Zealand. The first test was drawn at the Basin Reserve thanks to a New Zealand rearguard action led by Jeremy Coney.
The sides then went to Christchurch and a lively Lancaster Park pitch. England bowled first and was beyond poor, with too many short balls. Hadlee batted superbly to get to 99 and New Zealand mustered 307 inside a day. England then batted and failed to reach 100 in either dig. In the first innings it made 82 and that was followed by 93 in the second innings. No England batsman made it past 25. It was truly an embarrassing display by England and the game was all over in 12 hours and one minute.
The series then shifted to Auckland where New Zealand had the chance to bag its first series win over England.
It sealed the series with 496 in its first innings with John Wright, Jeff Crowe and Ian Smith all making centuries.
England made 439 in reply but the series was won by New Zealand.
2005 Lions
Rugby
This was a sideshow from start to finish.
With Clive Woodward in charge, there was always going to be plenty of off-field drama. The team started with 45 players and then blew out to more than 50 by the time the tour ended.
The Lions lost to New Zealand Maori but managed to beat some average provincial sides. Woodward never played his test team together before the first test in Christchurch and on a wet, windy night in the garden city, the All Blacks got home.
Then there was the drama of Brian O’Driscoll lasting one minute in the first test after a tip tackle. The Lions carried it on for too long.
They ran into an out-of-this-world Dan Carter in the second test and then simply had nothing left in the third test as the All Blacks totally dominated.
Woodward then had the audacity to say he would have done nothing different.
There was no visit to Buckingham Palace when the side got home.
