Hope you all had a happy Diwali last week.
I hadn't ever been a Diwali celebrant before, but I'm a total convert now.
Especially in Fiji, where Occupational Safety and Health (OSH) has never shown its face.
Honestly, the fireworks here in the islands have that same lethal, deafening, genuinely explosive quality that fireworks used to have and everyone, no matter how poor, can afford to buy a big bag full.
The interesting thing is that not a single person was injured and everyone had a lot of fun at this religious festival, which celebrates light conquering darkness.
The whole Guy Fawkes thing seems so wrapped in bad vibes and tedious OSH tosh it hardly seems worth bothering with.
All this obsession with safety really changes our life for the worse.
My mother is convinced that the reason there are so many small families these days is that children's car seats are so complicated, no-one has time to take more than two children anywhere in a car.
I can't help thinking the invention of effective contraception could be something to do with it.
But after 50 years I have learnt that only a fool would disagree with her.
However, I do think it's a shame children can't walk to and from school much any more or get told by their parents not to stay inside on a lovely day.
"Go on, get outside and don't let me see you till dinner time."
It would almost sound like child abuse these days.
Instead, we have: "You only have SPF 500 on and you've already had your 10 minutes of sun today. Come and play golf on your Wii box."
I have just read the latest Nora Ephron book of essays, I Remember Nothing, which comes out in New Zealand on December 3.
Remember that date.
This woman is a genius.
I thought she had looked into my head and seen all my thoughts, which are about such deep and meaningful things as egg-white omelettes, imported mineral water, Twitter and forgetfulness.
But in deep and meaningful literary discussion with the intellectual heavyweights I like to holiday with, I discovered Ms Ephron has looked into their heads as well and found the same thoughts.
This is very funny writing and nothing less than you would expect from the writer of Julie and Julia and I Feel Bad About My Neck.
It's been reading heaven up here - Sarah-Kate Lynch brought us up the proof copies of her new novel, which is due out early next year.
All I'm going to tell you about it is that it is set in Tuscany, is about a surprise family and had all of us alternately sobbing and laughing.
No dates yet, but we have nearly got a promise out of the author to come and do another book-launch talk in the Wakatipu.
This time we will choose a bigger venue, as Dorothy Browns was just not big enough for the crowd of readers who are so keen on this well-known and very much-loved New Zealand writer.
And this is just a little hint to Ken Follett fans: get reading and ready with some questions.
Rumour has it he might be heading our way soon to promote his new book, Fall of Giants.
My editor, who is lovely and wise and very kind, has hinted that maybe I will be allowed to meet him (Ken Follett, not the editor) and I have had sleepless nights dreaming of my hero (again KF, not the editor) and the witty, sparkling chitchat we will have together.
I think it would only be fair as my editor has already met my other hero, Bill Bryson.
I didn't really believe him as BB is more of a mythical being in my eyes.
To prove it, my editor sent me the brilliant story he wrote about spending a day with him in Dunedin when a seagull's poop hit the man of whom I am a fan.
Finally, after many recommendations from you to read American Wife, by Curtis Sittenfeld, I have finally done it and am very angry you didn't make more effort.
What a treat!
This is the apparently not-so-fictional story of Laura Bush and her not-so-smart former president husband.
It's a wonderful story and a fascinating look into the private lives of people who get very little private life.
